I had to get this out, and off my chest.

I don't even know how to begin this posting. In the last couple of months I have this desperation to seek out God. I've been a Christ follower for almost 2 years, many people wouldn't know that. I've always felt uncomfortable talking about God and religion. I had (and to some extent still do have) some problems with "church". It's taken me a long time to figure out that God and church are two different things. I also had problems with Christians, or anyone that was religious. The main problem I had was that I thought God's main message was to love your neighbor.

I should start this by saying that growing up we didn't go to church. I did go to church with friends. I went to lots of different churches, I even went to Catholic school for 4 yrs. What I heard at most of the churches was basically "If you don't believe our version of the Bible or don't believe at all, then you're a bad person and you're going to hell." I would think to myself, "Wow, God's mean, angry, and doesn't like people." But I remembered from my Catholic school days that God is love, and we're supposed to love our neighbors. I was so confused.

It was the same with individuals that called themselves believers.

I couldn't see myself being like them, and hating people that were different from me. I'm a pretty accepting person, or I try to be. I've been told many times that I'm too politically correct. (hmm, sorry but I will never, ever be ok with the word Retard being used as a stand in for Stupid, Dumb, etc)

When Jon and I began dating he told me he was a Christian. I told him I didn't know what I believed or if I believed in anything. We had several conversations, though he wasn't going to push his beliefs on me. (Good thing too, it never would have worked) I remember very clearly Jon telling me I could believe whatever I wanted, but that he would be really sad not to see me in Heaven. (ouch)

After he said that I agreed to go to his church, to try it on, again. I felt so out of place; there was music (really good music), people were singing, and raising their hands up, and clapping to the music. I was doing none of those things, and felt like everyone was looking at me because I wasn't doing the same things as they were. I felt like a hypocrite. I didn't belong there.

When we started out pre-marital counseling it was even worse. The guy who interviewed us, I don't know if it was to see if we were "good marriage candidates" or what. When he found out that I wasn't a Christ follower laid a huge guilt trip on me, basically told me I was going to hell because I didn't believe, and the topper, "You might as well believe, because what's is going to hurt?" Really? "what's it going to hurt?" I almost closed myself off right then and there.

Then we met Susie and Andy, our councilors. An amazing married couple who welcomed me, asked me questions and answered questions I had to the best of their ability. They sat with us on Sundays, and introduced us to people. They became our friends.
Then there was Ed, Pastor Ed. I've never heard anyone preach the way he does. I never understood the Bible, or Christianity. But his messages made sense, they spoke to current themes, to real life, they didn't lecture me about what I could or couldn't do, or who is "good" and who is "bad". And he is smart, going from translations to original language, giving context and history. Explaining how life was when the different passages were written. And best of all, he showed that God is the One to judge, not us. Our job is to love our neighbors, and to become better, more knowledgeable, to commit to God.

I saw where God was working in my life. I tried praying, and my prayers were answered. I began to see how Blessed my life was/is. Just before Jon and I got married I decided to ask God to come into my life. It was such a powerful day, and I'm still convinced that the prayer Ed said was directed at me. He even said, "I knew it." When I raised my hand so he could pray for me and my decision.

So why am I writing all of this in a blog?
In the last few months I've felt this urge to get back to church. At first it was a gentle nagging, it only happened every once in a while. Lately, in the past 3 weeks it's been a desperate push. Before we moved to Charleston I looked into churches but nothing seemed like it was near what we were used to. I found a church that was a "come as you are" church and listened to a pod-cast...the pastor has a thick South Carolina accent, and unfortunately southern accents have a tendency to make the speaker sound less intelligent than they are. (I know it's a totally horrible thing to think and say... but....) With this new desperation to get back to church, and to continue my journey as a Christ follower,I began the search anew. Last week Jon and I found a church that seems to be a good fit. I'm glad we've found a new church, but it still doesn't seem to be enough to quiet this urge. So I've decided to talk about my beliefs, to tell people that I believe in God and that Jesus died on the cross for us.

Something you should try

Guiness and Edy's (or Breyer's) Slow Churned Vanilla Bean ice cream. There's something about the sweet of the Vanilla Bean mixed with the bite of the Guiness.

Now I'm not saying make a float; take a bite, swallow, then take a sip....it's sooo good.

UGH! Why can't people spell

Okay so I'm not the best speller. I will admit that. But oh my gosh, I can spell the simple words.

I'm on a mommy website, Cafemom.com. People are constantly asking for advise and telling us that sense things are happening one way, etc. It's really, really getting on my nerves. I'm not sure if I should go into every group I'm in and post the correct spelling/meaning. I probably won't, but I'm soooo tempted every time I see people making these mistakes.
There was one post that had so many things wrong, punctuation, spelling, missing words.... I was thinking the worst thoughts about how uneducated the person was. I had to remind myself that not everyone has had the life that I have, that has been fortunate enough to go to amazing schools, with wonderful teachers in a safe city. I'm so glad that I was blessed with parents that loved and provided for me, and took an interest in my life.

Back to my frustrations. I think everyone should read the book: Eats shoots and leaves. If you haven't heard of it, it's a book by a teacher, or a group of teachers. They take examples of student work and show how, without the proper punctuation, groups of words can have completely different meanings. For example, the title of the book was taken from a report on Pandas! The panda eats, shoots, and leaves. But they should have left out the commas. It's so funny to me, but possibly because I'm a teacher? I dunno.

Why I love SC and the Navy life!

Why I love South Carolina, ok well mostly just Charleston.
Number 1-


Number 2- The archetecture. Downtown Charleston is the most amazing place I've ever seen. The iron work for the gates and window guards alone are breath taking, add to that the HUGE mansions, and old, old, old buildings. I have "My favorite roof, park, and windows". We go see them every time we're Downtown.

Number 3- The History! Everywhere you turn there's a historic building turned something else. An old slave auction building turned into an open air market, fire station turned into restaurants, etc. We've only been to one plantation... but they're also EVERYWHERE!

Number 4- The weather! Talk about variety. It was 80 degrees with 90% humidity when we got here. It rained every few days, and if we were lucky we got a thunder and lightning storm.(we had quite a few, I LOVED IT!) We've had both hurricane and tornado warnings, flooding, rediculous wind storms, earthquakes (if you can believe that), crazy heat, below freezing days and nights. It's wonderful! I love being able to see and feel the seasons change.

Why I love the Navy life.
Number 1- My new friends. They have helped me through tough times and have shared in some wonderful moments. They have made life more fun, comfortable, and easy. I love them and enjoy every second I have with them. I've also been able to reciprocate for them as well. I'm so glad we can be there for eachother. Like my mom was for her Navy wife friends.

Number 2- Jon's pride in himself, and his job. It's amazing to see him grow because of his new job. He's amazing. I'm so proud of him.

Number 3- Job security. (do I have to say more)

Number 4- I love the Navy trash! You see when Navy people move they throw away perfectly good stuff; you see sometimes you're only allowed a certain weight, or you're moving overseas and you can't take your furnature with you, or your kids have out grown toys and you haven't had time to sell their old toys. Today I got the most amazing chair, and it looks nearly brand new! We've also gotten Gryph a few toys from these curbside treasures!

Number 5- The chance to live where we never would otherwise. We're thinking or going to Guam or Hawaii for our next duty station. And after that possibly (I pray for this) Japan!

Our house is the hangout house.

So I've always wanted to have the house that people come to to hang out. You know that house, the one that's always fun, where you feel comfortable, welcome, and at home. I love having people around, socializing, laughing, hanging out, talking, etc.

My house is slowly but surely becoming that house! The first weekend we moved to SC we had two of Jon's friends from bootcamp over for dinner and video games. They came back every Friday for the next 4 months! We've adopted a few other sailors along the way. Friday has become our big "boys" night. It usually spills over to Saturday morning/afternoon. You should see the livingroom on Saturday morning, there's one person on the couch, and possibly another on the floor, and the there's usually someone in the "worlds most comfortable" bed in the office. (The boys have dubbed it that, though I agree whole heartedly).

There's nothing that gets me going quite like having a group at home, enjoying themselves.

It can get a little silly here, we apparently have a lot better of an internet connection than then boys to in their barrecks. So they are constantly on their laptops, checking e-mail, blogs, goofy websites, etc. We were BBQ-ing in the screened in patio on a very nice night. So Jon and I told the boys to come out side to join us while the food was being cooked. They came out, but so did their laptops, haha.
(Now I'm going to climb on to my soap box)
What has this world come to that you can't just sit in a lounge chair and enjoy nature, a warm breeze, good conversation, and relax. Now we need to have constant stimulation. Computers, tvs, cell phones with texting and e-mail.
I'm not perfect, but I have been trying to make a point of turning off the tv, computer, and cell and just enjoy the quiet and being with my family and friends.
I don't know if anyone's going to read this, but I hope you take the time to "unplug" and just sit outside and take in what nature and God have to show you. Gryphon and I really like sitting out in the patio watching the wind blowing through the trees.
What do you like?

Introduction

So if you're reading this you probably know me, and if you know me you know me pretty well. I'm not the kind of person to hold back much. I love to talk, and I guess a blog is the natural place for me to be.
Now that I'm a stay at home mom the only person I really get to talk to is Gryphon. He's a great listener, but doesn't contribute too much. I can cut him some slack though, he's only 8 months old. He's one of two people that own my heart. The other is of course Jon, my husband and best friend. Jon's the one person that has truely understood me, some times better than I understand myself. He has a way of seeing past my flakey, goofy, often mixed up outer layers to the core of me.
I can get off onto amazing tangents, Jon doesn't seem to mind too much, and can get me back on topic. He also appreciates the weird comments that I make, often helping me to laugh at myself instead of feeling embarrassed.

Okay, speaking of tangents...
Jon and I have spent the last three years making huge changes in our lives.
I started and finished my teaching credential program. Jon completed his culinary training program. While I was in school, Jon proposed, I said yes. I got a job teaching middle school in my hometown, with former teachers, and made some wonderful new friends. Jon planned out wedding while working at the company we both met at. Jon got a new job at a 5 star restraunt. We got married. I switched classes, teaching pre-school and kindergarten. Jon quits his job, hoping to find something that he's really passionate about. I get pregnant. Jon decides to join the Navy. He loses 60 lbs. I gain 25 lbs. Gryphon Kingsley is born. Three weeks later Jon leaves for basic training. He graduates, we move to Charleston, SC. I become a stay at home mom, and Jon is taking the Navy Nuclear school by storm. Gryphon figures out how to crawl and to pull himself up.
WHEW!!!! It's been a crazy couple of years. But we've enjoyed it all. I'm looking forward to things slowing down, for a little bit anyway.

So if you decide to subscribe to my blog then hopefully I keep it up, and hopefully I keep it entertaining.